Miranda Kerr was at the Paris fashion show, all pregnant and stuff, with that pregnant woman glow.

I’d hit that, though I think some of my readers would rather get hit my Orlando Bloom.

Sometimes I’m at a loss for words when I see such beauty, like Miranda Kerr here. Or, like last night, when two hot girls were frenching eachother on Entourage.

Anyway, take a look at Orlando Blooms wife to be (Fuck you Orlando!) Miranda Kerr in a behind the scenes video of her wearing Victoria’s Secret Cotton Lingerie line.

GOD.DAMN.

I think it’s been well documented on this site that I would bang Miranda Kerr like it was my last day on Earth, so when I saw these new pictures and video of her in the latest Victoria Secret line, I uh, well, I don’t want it to be my last day on Earth, but if Miranda Kerr fell from the sky, and onto my lap wearing what she’s wearing in these photo’s, well, you gotta do what you gotta do.

Oh lookie here, guess who’s making back to back appearances?? Why Miranda Kerr ofcourse, this time with a big blue ball. I wonder if she’s trying to send a message to Orlando Bloom or something.

I’m obviously not a fancy photographer, but if you’ve got Miranda Kerr in a shoot, why is she playing almost 4 fiddle to some other chicks? Don’t get me wrong, I’d do all the other chicks, but I’m just stay’n…

As you may know, I have a hard spot in my pants for girls that are willing to travel to me to get it on, so I cummed a little after reading this on the HuffingtonPost.com (Hi Arianna!)

On traveling for love:
“Oh gosh, I can’t even count how many times I’ve gotten on a plane for love. It’s not unusual in this business; my lifestyle demands it. I’m always traveling for [whispers] cock. You’ve got to go where it is.”

More:

On primal sex:
“I’m primal on an animalistic level, kind of like, ‘Bonk me over the head, throw me over your shoulder. You man, me woman.’ Not everybody has the right kind of primal thing for me…I love physical contact. I have to be touching my lover, like, always. It’s not optional.”

You know, I’ve seen her without makeup in so many pictures that…eeeh…who am I kidding? I’d pummel her vagina like it was the gateway to doing anal with Miranda Kerr’s ass.

Cameron, next time you’re in Vancouver and need some cock, I know a guy, that knows another guy, that knows a guy….

God damn, I need to move to Holland, or maybe just wear lots of orange and see what happens, The Daily Mail reports:

They were one of the highlights of the World Cup so far with their gorgeous looks and orange mini-dresses.

But while armchair viewers admired the 36 gorgeous Dutch girls supporting their team against Denmark, the World Cup organisers were rather more suspicious.

And when the half-time whistle blew they moved in and gave all 36 the red card after it was revealed they were part of an elaborate piece of ‘ambush marketing’ by the Dutch beer company Bavaria who are not official sponsors at the tournament.

Everyone knows the easiest way to get into any exclusive sort of event is it have some hot babes flashing skin around you. Megan Fox and Miranda Kerr could be axe murderer’s but if they showed up to the gates of heaven wearing almost nothing and smiling at me, well, I don’t think even God himself could blame me for letting them in.

After posting that fugly face of that girl that Tiger Woods planted his seed in in the previous post, I felt as though I really needed to make up to you, my loyal followers.

So the two of you should be happy to see Miranda Kerr in a bikini. My penis is.

Perez style, bitches.

(Photos taken by Sam Bisso)

A few days ago I posted the shots of Miranda Kerr in Numero Magazine as a naughty school girl, well now the video is out, and I think we can all be thankful that we don’t have to register in our local area to watch a watch a video of a hot school girl.

Unfortunately there’s no topless part in this, but whatever, something tells me you still jizzed in your pants after watching this.

Lady(?) Gaga released the video preview of her latest release, Alejandro, and she’s clearly copying Madonna in “Vogue”.

Fuck me sideways if I’m not a god damn genius (I checked the spelling on that word), but I knew this song reminded me of some old Madonna track.

Did she just go and raid Madonna’s old wardrobe closet for this? What’s next? She going to get Madonna’s arms?

With Christina Aguilera transforming herself into the second coming of Sir Gaga and now this, my poor penis can only hope that his true love Miranda Kerr doesn’t decide to stick with the fembot look.